Parenting preschoolers is not an easy business. I read this short piece by Brene Brown on what she learnt about parenting from Toni Morrison, and it resonated with me. How often is the first thought, when we see our children, not one of joy of their presence in our lives but how they look or act.
We need to think back to our own childhood and remember how it felt when we saw our parent for the first time after school. What did they say and how did it make us feel.
To build resilient children they need to understand that they might not always be the best, the first or get what they want, and our job is to help children develop that resilience within themselves.
“When kids know they have the unconditional support of a parent, family member, or even a teacher, they feel empowered to seek guidance and make attempts to work through difficult situations. Positive connections allow adults to model coping and problem-solving skills to children.” Kate Hurley LSCW
And part of that process is showing that unconditional joy and love at their presence in our lives. We as parents cannot, and should not, fix every problem that arises, but question, discuss and work through problems with a child to an understanding of why things have happened the way they have. Sometimes that means that the child will not get what they want, but that is building character and the resilience to understand the way of the world.
We cannot start this process too early, as children who are able to work through and accept life’s challenges while still moving forward in their lives, grow into teenagers and adults who can make informed decisions and have better outcomes for themselves and those around them.
– Louise Murfet Director/Nominated Supervisor/Educational Leader Jacaranda Preschool.